Here are the Ask Tim Archives

          I like this guy n he knows it because I told him and his friend I thought he was hot. When I first met
          him he told my friend I was hot but wasn't his type (IM kinda preppy n he's skater) and he recently
          told me I was cute, had nice eyes n was a nice person. We hang out and he always IMs me online.
          We recently had a very in depth conversation where a saw a different side of him. We flirt, too.   For
          example he liked it when I sat on his lap or licked my lips and he'll smile at me and he even picked me
          up once. I figured he would've asked me out already since he knows id like him n wood say yes!
          Why isn't he asking?

               What guy doesn't like it when a girl sits on his lap? Anyway, that's not the point to this whole
               thing. I say Avril has ruined it for everyone. She is the reason this guy is hesitant to ask you
               out. He's listened to Sk8er Boi one too many times and fears that you'll say, "See you later boy,"
               and think he's not good enough for him. Oh, but revenge will be sweet when he's rockin' on MTV
               and you regret your decision. Show him you're no Avril and he shall be yours!

          I like this guy but it's so obvious my best friend, from pre-school, does too and she won't tell me. I
          didn't tell her I like him because last time I did she was making up stories to try and make me
          jealous. She keeps trying to get me jealous still. Does she know I like him? This is confusing because
          I really liked him and I never stopped for 2 years. I don't know what to do. What do you think?

               Yes, yes, and yes. She obviously knows that you still like this guy. Even if you hadn't told her
               anything in the past about it, you say she has been your best friend since pre-school - anyone
               who has been friends with you for that long should be able to tell when you like someone. Also,
               it sounds like she's a bit of a jealous and insecure friend. Nice friend she is if she is making up
               stories like that. Sheesh. But yeah, she likes him too if she's doing that. She probably senses
               that you'd have a better shot at him, too. (Where does the guy stand on all of this?) Anyway,
               you're learning one of life's lessons pretty well on this one - women can be catty, ESPECIALLY
               when it comes to men. Or a sale at Loehmann's.   My advice? If you like the guy that much and
               this girl is being really rotten, then teach her the same lessons. Sharpen your claws, girl.

          My wife and I are thinking of inviting a few new sock monkey friends to live with us. We have a
          special room that we would like to make over into a suitable sock monkey habitat, however we
          really don't know what that would be. Tell us Tim, how can we create a room that would be the envy
          of every sock monkey?

               That baby son is throwing a monkey wrench into all of the plans, no pun intended. Normally, I
               would suggest a wall-to-wall fully stocked bar, a disco ball and a lip-shaped loveseat, but it would
               probably create too much noise for the sleeping lad. We sock monkeys can get a little buck wild.
               So let me think about this from a wholesome point of view. Wow, this is hard. I hardly ever get
               to use this part of my sock brain. Okay, I'm going to get a little mushy here, but ONLY for the
               sake of helping others. Don't tell anyone. If the sock monkeys are comfortable, taken care of,
               and well-loved, then we really don't care what the room looks like. Being treasured by a person
               makes any monkey the envy of those who are stuck on shelves and in closets. Oh, and a
               jukebox would help. Best of luck with your son - you know, I hear 'Tim' is a fine name....