Flea...Fleafly...Fleafly Mosquito....

Picture of the Month:

I have to cause all of my mischief at night...

     Hey hey kiddies, and happy April to you all! I hope everyone had a rockin'
March and a Happy Easter. I spent the day avoiding the ham. Ham is bad. Ham is
evil. Ham is not a monkey's friend.   I also had to do some publicity early last month
after the release of Hearts in Atlantis on video and DVD. I have a small role in that, a
favor for my old pal Tony Hopkins.   You can call him Sir Anthony. I usually just call
him a cab after we've partied together a little too hard. As I mentioned last month, I
headed up to Boston to catch a preview of The Graduate before it headed to Broadway.
I highly recommend it to everybody, but try not to yell out "Hubba Hubba" when
Kathleen Turner drops her towel. I don't think the other theater patrons appreciated
my outburst. But screw them, she was buck naked! That's got to get a howl out of the
sock. In any event, click here to see 2 pictures from my day in Boston.   Okay, where
was I? Ah yes, naked women. Wait, my mom just told me to keep this a "clean" site,
so I'll have to change the subject. Rats. E-mail me, we'll talk.

So on to Foolish April - this month there are a few new song requests as always on
the Requests Page. As promised, there is Part II, or should I say Episode II of my
Star Wars-related movie clip trilogy premiering this month. You can see all of the
silliness unfold on my Movies Page. And finally, there is a new member of the slap
club on my page of People I Would Like to Slap.    I think you'll all agree with me on
this month's victim.   Oh, he chaps my little sock hide. Aside from that, I plan on doing
some relaxing this month. Translation: booze and girls all night long. I can't wait! But
before the debauchery commences, I feel I need to address a few issues that have been
popping up from time to time from you awesome folks out there. I thank you all for
your concern regarding the size of my arms, but I'm really fine. They look much
smaller in pictures. I'm really like a sock replica of Jeff Speakman with these 'ceps in
person. And to my pal G.I. Joe Merten: if it's got alcohol in it, I'm down. He was
concerned about my "girlie" choice of Sutter Home white zin in one of my photos.
Don't worry, it won't be leading me down the path to an alternate lifestyle. I like them
ladies WAY too much. I'll drink that freakish green tea stuff if it's loaded. Call me
Merten, we'll hit the bars. On that note, I shall be off for the time being. Shout out to
my boys: Jay, Eric, and Steve. I freakin' told you guys NO! See you at the next
karaoke romp. And now, ladies and gentlemen, Tim has left the building....

See you all next time!

Tim

   Recommended Song of the Month: Sidewalk Talk, by Jellybean Benitez and Madonna.
   Am I the only one who remembers this song? Be careful if you listen to it: you might have a
   sudden urge to wear flourescent-colored clothing and do the caterpillar.

Recommended April Fool's Day Prank: C'mon, EVERYONE enjoys the ex-lax in the
coffee. Fun stuff for all involved.

Recommended Time Suckage of the Month: Guess the Dictator or TV Sitcom Character
game. Play it here. Curse me later.

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